Originally Posted by
EchoMarine
Okay, for the last f**king time!
Darkslayerx!
We have made that list, because everytime we had a clan war, the other clan dosn't show up, so we made that list, that tells us the clans who will be there, so everybody in that list we called them good
We have made that list, (1) because everytime (2) we had (3) a clan war, the other clan dosn't (4) show up, so we made that list, (5) that tells us the clans who
will be there, (6) so everybody in that list we called them (7) good.
1. Do not use a comma after an introductory phrase before a long clause.
2. Do not conjoin "every" and "time."
3. Use the phrase "have had" instead of "had," as "had" implies a singular instance as opposed to a more frequent occurrence.
4. "Dosn't" is not a word. "Doesn't" is.
5. Do not use a comma between an independent and a dependant clause.
6. This is a good point to end your sentence. This is a run-on. Periods are your friend.
7. The use of "them" is redundant; you have already made it clear you are referring to "everybody in that list."
Last edited by gill066; Sep 7, 2008 at 04:59 AM.