Was from Grandmas Boy. :P

31
" I look at going to Hollywood as going behind enemy lines. You parachute in, set up the explosion, then fly out before it goes off."

32...ready for a long one?
“It is important to note that suddenly, and against all probability, a Sperm Whale had been called into existence, several miles above the surface of an alien planet. Since this is not a naturally tenable position for a whale, this innocent creature had very little time to come to terms with its identity. This is what it thought, as it fell;”Ahhh! Woooh! What's happening? Who am I? Why am I here? What's my purpose in life? What do I mean by who am I? Okay, okay calm down calm down get a grip now. Ooh, this is an interesting sensation. What is it? Its a sort of tingling in my... well I suppose I better start finding names for things. Lets call it a... tail! Yeah! Tail! And hey, what's this roaring sound, whooshing past what I'm suddenly gonna call my head? Wind! Is that a good name? It'll do. Yeah, this is really exciting. I'm dizzy with anticipation! Or is it the wind? There's an awful lot of that now isn't it? And what's this thing coming toward me very fast? So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding name like 'Ow', 'Ownge', 'Round', 'Ground'! That's it! Ground! Ha! I wonder if it'll be friends with me? Hello Ground!”
Curiously the only thing that went through the mind of the bowl of petunias, as it fell, was, "Oh no, not again." Many people have speculated that if we knew *why* the bowl of petunias had thought that we would know a lot more about the nature of the Universe than we do now.”

33
"The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. But not in that order."

Is it ok to double post if we're saying seperate quotes?

34
"This one time I thought I saw a cat...but it was a car."

35
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits."

36
"Owned, sire."

37
"Ten banana cream pies!"

38
"It isn`t premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married. "

39
"If you stuck with it throughout the entire thing, give yourself a mental pat on the back. If you gave up halfway through, give yourself a mental chastising."
-my calc teacher

40
"Get to the chopper!"