Secret Santa 2024
Originally Posted by torikill10 View Post
If GT2 stands for Gran Turismo 2, then it's a no.

When I said that the storage media smells like something it LITERALLY smells like something.
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I'll give you a tip. It's a franchise that put a year in front of the franchise's name. For example, Formula 1 2012.
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I hope you can understand now. I'll give you an exception. As the question isn't very clear, you have one more chance.

My answer was correct my friend, the original copy came with a scratch n sniff disc. Hah.
"I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am"[Death Plague] "Light the fuses, BITCHES!"
LOL. You're right. The answer I was expecting is FIFA 2001. The CD smells like grass. I'm sorry.

Here's your 200 tc.
"N00b clap works too properly for being called a n00b move."
Haha, didn't know about that one, since I hate football games. (SOCCER)
"I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am"[Death Plague] "Light the fuses, BITCHES!"
Rogue Warrior

Platform: Microsoft Windows, Microsoft Xbox 360, Sony Playstation 3
Gender: FPS
Developer: Rebellion Developments
Publisher: Bethesda Softworks
Release Year: December 1, 2009

Since I started doing reviews for this forum, I’ve never done a bad game review. But, today I’ll do a bad review. Not because I am in a bad mood. It’s the opposite. I’m going to give the best point of view of this game.
Rogue Warrior is a FPS game which wants to mix stealth with action. The story is simple. It’s Cold War. American soldiers are in a mission and they have trespassed The Iron Curtain. They were investigating North Korea’s missile factory, when they are attacked. The only survivor is Dick Marcinko, an unstoppable killing machine and the most profane character I’ve ever played with. Ignoring his superiors, he tracks alone the missiles, carving a path of destruction through North Korea to Soviet Russia. Simple story. Can’t say anything about it. Also, the person who did Dick Marcinko’s voice did a good job, because he really looks like a badass. But that’s the only 2 OK things in the game.






Graphics sucks. I played this game at Max and in 1920X1080. My computer slowed down, but the little time I played at this resolution showed how the game sucks at graphics. The enemies aren’t that detailed, motion blur doesn’t work correctly(too much blur), there are some stages that water is just an animated texture, it doesn’t move when shot, too artificial blood, fire is a low-res texture that rotates with you… But at least, when you shoot, the bullet capsules fall, most of the lights in game turn off when you shoot them… It sucks. Not completely, but it sucks.






The gameplay features the basics of a FPS game. You can walk, run(almost unlimited sprint that when it ends, 3 seconds later you can sprint again), shoot(terrible aim), you can aim( aim in default is space, terrible), throw grenades( grenades in default are mouse right button), crouch( there isn’t prone position in the game, but there is no problem since no matter in what stance you shoot, it’s still terrible), reload( if you do any other move, like use the cover when reloading, the reload action is cancelled and you need to press again. If you move again, it will cancel and so on), use cover( at least cover works pretty well. You can also use blind fire.) and do finish moves and stealth kills. These two last moves are the most interesting ones. The finish moves and stealth kills are brutal and cool. Of course, they repeat after some time but they are still cool. The camera goes in a 3rd person perspective and shows each detail of the death. But there are some things that aren’t cool and they are valid for the entire game, including common kills and headshots.






When you kill someone, there is no bullet’s mark, no knife’s mark, only an artificial blood that doesn’t mark the victim’s clothes. Sometimes, when you shoot(most of the time with headshots), the bullets simply do nothing. Yes, nothing. I’m sure that I shot him on his head but instead of dying, he just screams and all the soldiers from that area(in this review area is the part of the stage between one checkpoint and another) simply know where you are and start shooting. Now let me talk about each way of playing this game.






Stealth doesn’t change. Easy, Normal or Hard. Stealth is the same. You can kill your enemies by piercing them with your combat knife (Dick doesn’t put his hand on the enemy’s mouth and when you pierce an enemy, instead of screaming, the enemy just do an “OOOH” sound. Like a surprise.) Or using a pistol with a silencer. You can also run when close to an enemy that they don’t move a muscle. But when the action starts, things change. Easy and Normal feel balanced. Things that happen have a bit of logic. Most of the enemies are smart. And the game runs good, bugged but good. You can get the enemy’s weapon too (I think the game have less than 10 weapons). But when played at hard, the game is too hard. If you put your head out of the cover(long cover like 7 crates) in the left side and you hide, the enemy doesn’t know where you are right? But at the same time you put your head out of the cover in the right side, you get shot on the head. HOW Nobody can move a weapon and do a headshot in 0.2 seconds! The game is almost unplayable on hard.






The game has 9 missions and lots of bugs. You can beat this game on normal if you play seriously (I dare you. Nobody can play this game seriously) in 3 hours. And if you play again, you will beat in 1 hour and a half. This game has so many bugs, graphic fails and bad scene planning (there’s a mission where you invade a Russian palace and you redirect their missiles to themselves. The missile looks like a pen, and when it hits the palace, the windows get destroyed. ONLY THE WINDOWS!) that I don’t even need to say if this game worths a place on your shelf.

That's the only good part of this game
Courtesy of funkyoulol2



Lyrics:
------------------------------------
F*ckin ninja style
Im gonna bring it to em
Im gonna show em what time it is.

Its fun to bring the noise

AH

you moronsll love this
Hope you *ssholes like fireworks
OOH

F*cking commies getting in my way,
Well surprise motherf*ckers!
Happy f*cking birthday
Thats right

Nighty-night you sweet piece of sh*t
Enjoy the ride, c*cksuckers
Have a nice trip

Boom time baby
Trick or treat
Looks like a party, cmon
I got places to go, people to meet.

*ssholes are everywhere
F*ckers are out in force
Hi ho, hi ho
This f*ckers gonna blow.

Anytime
Anywhere
Anyplace

Kickin ass and taking names
Whos the hardest motherf*ckers around
HAH

Rock and roll, motherf*ckers
Rock and roll

OOH
AHH

Hide and seek, motherf*ckers
Anybody home?
Daddys here
Cmon, glad to see me f*ckers?

Send me the bill
Motherf*cking c*cksuckers

Im over here f*ckface
Theres gonna be f*cking asses bleeding all over the place
Sorry, *ssholes, but your quiet day at the office
is about to get severely f*cked up

Anytime
Anywhere
Anyplace

Kicking ass and taking names

Whos the hardest motherf*ckers around, HAH?

Gimmie a goddamn break!

Good place to blow some shit up.

AH
OOH
MM
AH
HNNNGH

What the f*ck was I doing again?
Oh, yeah.
F*cking sh*t up.

Goddamn, c*ck breath commie motherf*ckers
You f*cking *sshole
You f*cking pig farmers
Drop dead motherf*cker
You f*cking amateurs

I own your f*cking souls
F*cking commie b*tch
Yeah, some capitalism for you, pussy

Time to move
I got bad guys to send
to Commie Heaven
F*cking ninja style

Im gonna bring it to them
Im gonna show them what time it is

Final Score


2.0/10
Last edited by torikill10; Jan 21, 2013 at 08:47 PM.
"N00b clap works too properly for being called a n00b move."
F*cking lyrics duuuudeeeeee. Seems like a fun game to me, but the part where the bullets do nothing made me not want to play it anymore.
"I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am"[Death Plague] "Light the fuses, BITCHES!"
Originally Posted by Simondigi2 View Post
F*cking lyrics duuuudeeeeee. Seems like a fun game to me, but the part where the bullets do nothing made me not want to play it anymore.

The game gives you some fun for 2 hours. If you like "F*cking humor" you will love these 2 hours. Also, the game has some bugs. But it's cool. I got the game as a gift, so, for me it made no difference xD
"N00b clap works too properly for being called a n00b move."
bugs? I'll give you some of my sonic 06

I fucking love sonic 06. It's so bad that it's hilarious to play it.
Just for saying. That 2.0 grade was about the technical stuff. I got addicted to the game. But I don't recommend it. I think you should play a mission, and then decide if you wanna play it. The first mission already shows how the game is.
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Also, two mistakes were made on the review.

1- When you SHOOT enemies, blood appears on their clothes. Not when you STAB them.
2-Reload action doesn't get cancelled when you manually crouch, open a door or plant a bomb.

Give me some opinion and suggestions! How do you like my reviews? Is there anything that you want me to review or change? I'll do what I can!
Last edited by torikill10; Jan 22, 2013 at 12:43 AM. Reason: <24 hour edit/bump
"N00b clap works too properly for being called a n00b move."
Ok, time for a review of a more...unusual game.

Welcome to Sumotori Dreams, a game where up to four drunk sumo wrestlers made out of blocks shove/flail in the air, trying to knock each other down. Last person standing wins.

The following story combines a review with my first time playing this game.

When I first played this game after hearing about it from a classmate, I bought the full version without playing the demo, because I heard it was one of the most hilarious games I would ever play, and the full version was highly recommended instead of sticking with the demo. It was only $5, hinting that the game must be quite short. I opened it up, and as soon as I saw the menu, I was already quite confused and impressed.



The first thing that hit me was the fact that the menu dropped down from the top and swayed around and stuff. Then, I chose "you vs computer". I expected to just start the game, but then I see a blue block THROWN at the option, breaking the board. THEN, the game started. I was already liking the game, and I hadn't even gotten past the MENU, which was probably the coolest, most unique menu I've ever seen.

Then the game started. I see two people, one blue, one white. They were made out of blocks, and they were standing in a ring. All around the ring were wooden planks, upright. They started to crouch to the ground like they're about to take a crap in the ring.



The graphics were interesting and the way the characters were designed was unique, and I was loving it. I saw directions/controls in the upper right corner. I started the match with S and realized I was the blue character. The opponent did the same, then the match started.

What happened next was so crazy that I had no idea what I was actually watching at first.

I pressed W, which made my guy start "walking" forward. The reason why I put that in quotes is because he wasn't really walking. He, to my confused surprise, started to walk like a zombie who was walking home from going to his local bar. And so did my opponent.



I started to giggle hysterically. Then I got shoved by my opponent, and the motions my character made literally made me almost pee myself. THE BLUE GUY STARTED TO BALANCE HIMSELF LIKE A BLIND TAP-DANCER IN A BRAWL. Then he fell down in one of the most ridiculous poses I've ever seen.



This is one of the reasons why this game is so awesome, because basically, it's so stupid it's fun, and the characters' motions are absolutely hilarious.



Then the white guy suddenly fell on top of me, and suddenly we were in some kind of extremely awkward sex position.



I lost the match, but I could still play, so I tried to shove my opponent down, and something like the following picture happened.



So...I played with this for a bit, then went back to the menu. Like I said, you can have up to 4 people, which was quite awesome. So that's what I did. I clicked "you vs 4 comp" and suddenly, there was a green guy, and a brown guy fighting as well. This match also made me nearly have to go to the bathroom. Here was the result:



Finally, I went to the Arena Selection, definitely eager for more. There are up to 6 stages, which doesn't seem like much, but you can download a map editor, which is an EXTREMELY cool feature, so basically there are hundreds of levels. The default levels are the Default Dojo, which was in the pictures.

Then there's "Kitchen Party"



"Roof Dancers"



"Play Seesaw"



"Up on the Stage"



And my favorite, "I go Downstairs"



Each of these levels are unique, fun to play, and hilarious in their own ways.

There IS a 2-player option(s), but no online content AT ALL, except for the user-made levels.

This game probably gave me the best first-time-playing moment out of all the games I've ever played.

Overall:

Pros: Graphics are unique, physics are well done and funny, has the coolest menu in any game I've ever seen, the characters' motions are roll-on-the-floor hilarious, the AI manages (probably for the first time ever out of ANY GAME EVER) to feel almost nonexistent, but in an actually positive way instead of a "the AI sucks. It's like the developers didn't play their own crappy game while designing it" way. (The AI was probably MADE to be that stupid, but how they managed to make the AI so awesome with so little, I don't know), the map editor allows you to make your own levels, the controls are simple but effective (controls many people don't know about: Home and Page Up to control camera, 7 to stop time, 8 to slowmotion, 9 to speed up, print-screen to take a screenshot, hold down S/Downarrow for about 1 second, then let go to jump. Also, there is a way to activate a secret mode in the menu. Try to find it!)

Cons: For some reason it's kinda hard to stay upright out of the ring in the Default Dojo, when an opponent falls on you it can take forever to get him off so you can get up (or just getting up yourself if you are on debris), making maps can be a little complex from what I've seen in tutorials, game itself can be somewhat hard to run smoothly on some computers from what I've heard, could use an online fighting mode for up to 4 people.

Final rating: 9/10.

Finally, here is one of my videos on Sumotori Dreams, playing the user-made level "Soccer": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oX4BFekDmwE
I play video games for my entertainment and sometimes records them for your entertainment as well. http://www.youtube.com/user/MrPivotmaster99