A dude ask me what a pc was

Meh here's another... again not sure if already posted...

There's man in a forest. He's starving and tired. He comes across a house so he rushes as fast as he can to it. When he knocks on the door, an old man greets him. The man asks if he can stay for food and shelter but the old man refuses. The man continues to ask until finally the old man gives in. "But be warned," he says, "if you sleep with my daughter I will commit the 3 greatest torture methods of man against you." So the man is let in and soon he falls asleep. He is woken up for suppertime, but he can't eat. He's too busy looking at the old man's daughter, who can't keep her eyes off him. So in the middle of the night, the daughter and the man sneak out and have sex... awesome. Anyways, when they were done they went back to the house and the man fell asleep.

When he woke up there was a big rock on his chest with a note saying "Man's First Greatest Torture: Rock on Chest" The man laughed and picked up the rock. "If this is the first torture the last two must be a joke," the man said. So he throws the rock out the window. But before it falls out he notices a note attached to the bottom of the rock. It read: Man's Second Greatest Torture: Left Testicle Tied to Rock. The man panics, but thinks quickly and jumps out the window with the rock. As the man is falling he notices a note attached to the outside wall of the house. Man's Third Greatest Torture: Right Testicle Tied to Bedpost

Three men met at a party, and it wasn't long until the conversation
got around to their line of work and what kind of cars they drove.
"I own a sign company," the first man said. "So naturally, I have a purple Neon."
The other two men nodded.
"I'm a veterinarian," said the second fellow. "I have a white `Vet."
The third guy was quiet for a minute.
"Well," he finally said, "I'm a proctologist. I have a brown Probe."

I hope I win so so so bad!!

A man who is visiting on a farm realizes a pig with leaping three feet inside the property. Without understanding why an animal like that would be maintained in a productive farm, asked the administrator.

-- Son - said the farmer - the pig is a hero. There was a fire that started in stable and has spread to our house when everybody was sleeping. This pig managed to jump out of chiqueiro released and all other animals, who fled from stable and was rescued. Then the pig opened the door of the funds of our house and brought out healthy and saved. The pig farm and saved the lives of all my family.

-- Now I understand - said the visitor. -- But why the pig has only three legs?

-- Because, son, as a pig that can not be eaten at once.

A mother and her 7 yr old son were driving in their car behind a garbage truck. When they came to stop at the lights the garbage truck stopped suddenly and out the back came flying a GIANT DILDO. Quickly the mother says oh poor bug hit our windscreen, to disguise the fact that its a dildo, to that her son replies "I'm surprised it got anywhere with a dick that big!"

yay, bit lame but meh

SOUTH
THE BLIND MAN

a blind man, went to the bathroom:
- uhh!! aaHH!! ready I already did...
but when him less he waited, he noticed that the toilet paper had finishing...
- whoa... the one that I will do now...
but the very nervous blind man thought:
- I will clean my ass with the finger, later I wash in the sink...
he cleaned, he left the bathroom, and it was towards sink, but as he was blind, it didn't find the sink, so a very crooked boy, he spoke for the blind man:
- gentleman the sink this his right...
but actually the blind man's right had an arrested nail in the wall, the blind man said:
- thank you boy
so the blind man put the dirty finger in the nail, and with pain in the finger, he put the dirty finger in the mouth...

hehehehehe!!!... XD

...

What?

Enjoy this one ^^

During a Papal audience, a business man approached the Pope and made this offer: Change the last line of the Lord's prayer from "give us this day our daily bread" to "give us this day our daily chicken." and KFC will donate 10 million dollars to Catholic charities. The Pope declined. 2 weeks later the man approached the Pope again. This time with a 50 million dollar offer. Again the Pope declined. A month later the man offers 100 million, this time the Pope accepts. At a meeting of the Cardinals, The Pope announces his decision in the good news/bad news format. The good news is... that we have 100 million dollars for charities. The bad news is that we lost the Wonder Bread account!

He: Do you wanna fuck me?
She: O_o Where are you from?
He: German)))
She: We fucked you at 45)))

<Nub> Somebody can explain, how amoebas are made multiple copies?
<K4rli> o
<K4rli> 0
<K4rli> 8
<K4rli> oo