my judging process, in order of steps:

1. its not rap
2. its not really repetitive
3. its catchy
4. it has a good rhythm

Harmony all the way

Needs a good beat. Can't just like a techno song with the constant beat. Not too much repetition, I'm fine with a chorus, not a short song repeating like 20 times. And for rap..I don't want the song to be 100% rap, I like rap with some singing, and a decent beat.

1. Does Pitchfork like it?

• • • • • Techno
        • Lyrics
        • Rythum
        • CATCHY
        • Funny (SomeTimes)

The guitar is probably the big one for me because in most cases the opening riff is what gets me to listen. unless it starts with vocals. But vocals are also very important for me, which is probably the reason I don't like mainstream rap since a good amount of it is about the same thing. Partying and having sex. not all but a good amount.

Videos have relatively no importance to me. I don't even watch them most of the time.