I havent slept for days. So that is now TL ; DR

I had a theme day on omegle.

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You: How is babby formed?
Stranger: lol
You: How girl get pregnant?
You: =S
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You: How is babby formed?
Stranger: hi where are you from ?
You: How girl get pregnant?
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Stranger: suck my cock
You: How is babby formed?
Stranger: even though it doesnt exist
Stranger: baby is formed by you SHUTTING THE EFFF Up
Stranger: yehhhh
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You: How is babby formed?
Stranger: Uhm.
Stranger: They
Stranger: Live in a can
You: But... How girl get pregnant?
Stranger: They eat the can
You: Would'nt taht hurt?
Stranger: No
You: What kind of can is it?
Stranger: A tin one
Stranger: Duh
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You: How is babby formed?
Stranger: How is babby formed?
You: How girl get pregnant?
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You: How is babby formed?
Stranger: Oooh.
Stranger: I know this one.
You: Well? How is babby formed?
You: How girl get pregnant?
Stranger: Ask the person who's so fat that when she stands on weighing scale I see my telephone number.
You: Your mom?
Stranger: Noice.
Stranger: Set myself right up- for that. xD
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Haha, good job krae XD

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You: What is this?
Stranger: ? <strange azn glyph>
You: Oh fuck, it's a zerger.
Stranger: fuck your mather
You: Wait a bit, I have to look up the word "mather".
Stranger: dou you like fuck?
You: Seems like the word "mather" doesn't exist. Or is it a word from the Zerg language, you korean degenerate?
Stranger: your mother?dou you kown?
You: No, I doun't kown. If you're going to speak in english, you might aswell learn the language. It's not THAT complicated.
You: But I guess some low-life scum like you couldn'nt understand it.
Stranger: from?
You: Asians have smaller brains than real people, you know.
You: You're practically monkies.
Stranger: damn
You: Yeah. You should probably just go kill yourself, to help the gene pool.
Stranger: fuck
You: Wow, you're really GREAT at expressing yourself. Truly, I am astounded by your immense vocabulary.
Stranger: you big shit!!!!!
You: Impressive! You're getting better, fellow monkey.
You: It's sad, though. Your non-human brain will never understand the complexity of the world. Go back to swinging in the trees, please.
Stranger: monkey is your father?
You: No, you're not my father. You are a monkey. You should be in the jungle, or possibly in a zoo.
Stranger: yes your father come from jungle
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

With love from Soviet Kraetyz <3

Krae, you are win.

Thank you, comrade.

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Stranger: salam
Stranger: he
Stranger: hej
Stranger: hola
Stranger: hello
Stranger: hallo
You: Good day.
Stranger: Good day stranger
Stranger: What is your name?
You: My name is of no importance. I have been waiting for you. You hold the key.
Stranger: But if you have been waiting for me, then i really wanna know your name.
You: As said, it is of no importance. You do not know me. But I know you, Anakha.
Stranger: You've got wrong person.
Stranger: My name is'nt Anakha, Im Julia.
You: Anakha is but a title, Julia. You, Anakha Julia, is the one without a fate. Shape your destiny as you wish, and the gods will fear.
Stranger: I dont belive in some god.
You: Of course you don't. But they believe in you. And they fear you.
Stranger: Why do you keep calling my Anakha?
You: Because you are Anakha.
Stranger: But who are Anakha?
You: Anakha is the one, chosen by the stars, created by Bhelliom. Your fate is not created by the gods, and because of this, they can't see what you will do, and what you will become. You're free, Anakha. And I have come, to help you. There are errors in this world, which no ordinary mortal could correct. But you, Anakha, you can unite the world. The fight of men is the fight of gods, and so, all men are bound under the gods. Except for you.
Stranger: Do you say that i am special?
You: More than special. You have the opportunity to become one of the greatest people who have ever lived, Anakha.
Stranger: Why should i need your help?
You: Because you have yet to find your power. My knowledge of Anakha and Bhelliom is most certain greater than yours, and I can aid you, so that you may rise and unite the world, and the universe itself.
Stranger: My power? Like what
You: You have yet to see, and I cannot explain the sheer awesome powers that you will have, once you have understood the true meaning of Anakha, and Bhelliom. I can show you the way, but you must walk it yourself.
Stranger: What kind of retard are you?
You: I will send you two pills, which you will recieve in the mail. Then, Anakha Julia, you have to make a choice. If you eat the blue pill, you will stay in your current normal life, and forever be unaware that you are the spawn of Bhelliom. Take the red pill, and you will find the truth. Free your mind.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: i dont wanna be the one
Stranger: "the one"
You: "The one"... That's a well-chosen name for Anakha. For there can only be one, you see. You have been chosen. If you do not accept, the world's sundering will continue, and suffering of humans will be endless.
Stranger: The hole world does'nt revolve on me, thats fact
Stranger: im just one of all people in the world.
Stranger: stop joking around with people, what if i was a little girl? then i would be really scared. take som responsibility
You: Your responsability is too great to ignore, Anakha. No matter age, gender or race, you must stand up. For humanity, and for life itself.
Stranger: didnt you understand what i wrote? i dont belive in your shit
You: If you do not believe, that is a shame. I hope, however, that your mind will change in time. I might contact you again, should this occur.
Stranger: huh
Stranger: bye
Stranger: then i will see you later
You: Think about my offer. I hope you will choose the red pill
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


I love David Eddings. And The Matrix. <3

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A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: I see you in line at the supermarket. Our eyes meet.
Stranger: Really, you have beautiful eyes...
You: I mouth the words to you, as if in slow motion:
You: Fuck me. Fuck me.
Stranger: i hope youre a female person?
You: My wishes are like poetry in your eyes. We want this moment to last forever.
You: We are like two dancers, for whom the music never stops. I Kiss the top of your hand. You are taken aback by the bulge that forms in your thigh.
Stranger: What should we do now?
You: I grab the bulge that you feel. I think it must be taking over my mind, theres nothing else I can think of. Your tubesteak to me is like a beautiful japanese haiku.
You: The salmon swim at night.
Towards my room.
The snow and the moon.
Stranger: =D
Stranger: What else will happen?
You: To your light bulb I am the Thomas Edison of your sex. Without my light you would be lost in a sea of darkness.
You: So you ready to fuck then?
Stranger: Yes
You: you unbutton my pants, spew your load at the sight of my underwear, and you're spent.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Fun.

Jim, don't do bloodninja on Omegle. That's my thing!

You: Hello
Stranger: heyy
Stranger: m or f
You: Male, fucker!
You: Haha! I wasted valuable seconds of your fap time!
You: You can never get that back!
You: NEVER!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

^

Ahhhh, that made my day ^_^