I will be the first to admit: I am a virgin. I have been on-and-off dating with my girlfriend for the past 3 years. I (in a teenagers belief anyways) love her to death. She wants to have sex. But I am simply not ready to make that step. That's fine. She is understanding of that. You really need to work on the emotional aspects of the relationship, that way as your love for one another reaches new heights; you're physical actions will just occur naturally.
I was thinking in the same way, until everything fucked up: the love and my understanding of the world. When you become older you will realize that it's better to start relationships with sex as soon as possible. That's like a 1st checkpoint in a racing game. There is no love w/o passion.
Last edited by Hector; Feb 25, 2010 at 02:26 PM.
[Damned] Clan Bank. All inventory on sale
Hector: That underevaluating statement couldn't have been more shallow or untrue. 1st checkpoint in a racing game? That's exactly the type of thinking of someone who values physical pleasure more than deep emotional relationships.
If I had to guess: You practiced the moral philisophy I just stated. You found a girl who you loved. You then dated with her, didn't want to rush into anything physical, and felt on top of the world. And that's when it happened: she broke up with you. Maybe even cheated on you with someone else? People these days take a jab to the jaw and rather than keep their chin up and practice the same techniques to win a fight that you always have done: play it defensive and swagger off.
I am not saying that passion isn't an aspect of any relationship, but passion doesn't mean sex. Passion can be that overwhelming feeling after holding the warm hands of your lover. Passion can be that comfort you feel when your partner holds you by their side for protection, safety, warmth. Passion can be that one wonderful and majestic kiss after a sincere and romantic moment, staring deeply into their eyes and telling them how much you love them. Sure, there are the more physical moments. The times where you make out, maybe french kiss. Maybe she lets you cup a feel. Maybe her hand went a little more below the waist, or your hug grabbed a little farther south than her hip. But all of these great moments involving physical satisfaction aren't nearly as satisfying as the emotional moments.
I will give you an example. Say anything happens that's more physical than emotional. Say making out in the back of a movie theatre. Is that a great moment for us? Sure. But it's when she looks into my eyes deeply and tells me that I make her life soo much better and that she will always love me that feels my heart with more warmth and happiness than any sexual act.
And before anyways asks me: Yes. Sex is great. Sex is suppose to be the ultimate bond in the relationship between a man and a woman. Where they both emotionally and physically become one entity. But all physical moments are only as satisfying as the emotions that run through both of you. Forget physical and sexual progression. It's the heart that brings the most feelings.
If I had to guess: You practiced the moral philisophy I just stated. You found a girl who you loved. You then dated with her, didn't want to rush into anything physical, and felt on top of the world. And that's when it happened: she broke up with you. Maybe even cheated on you with someone else? People these days take a jab to the jaw and rather than keep their chin up and practice the same techniques to win a fight that you always have done: play it defensive and swagger off.
I am not saying that passion isn't an aspect of any relationship, but passion doesn't mean sex. Passion can be that overwhelming feeling after holding the warm hands of your lover. Passion can be that comfort you feel when your partner holds you by their side for protection, safety, warmth. Passion can be that one wonderful and majestic kiss after a sincere and romantic moment, staring deeply into their eyes and telling them how much you love them. Sure, there are the more physical moments. The times where you make out, maybe french kiss. Maybe she lets you cup a feel. Maybe her hand went a little more below the waist, or your hug grabbed a little farther south than her hip. But all of these great moments involving physical satisfaction aren't nearly as satisfying as the emotional moments.
I will give you an example. Say anything happens that's more physical than emotional. Say making out in the back of a movie theatre. Is that a great moment for us? Sure. But it's when she looks into my eyes deeply and tells me that I make her life soo much better and that she will always love me that feels my heart with more warmth and happiness than any sexual act.
And before anyways asks me: Yes. Sex is great. Sex is suppose to be the ultimate bond in the relationship between a man and a woman. Where they both emotionally and physically become one entity. But all physical moments are only as satisfying as the emotions that run through both of you. Forget physical and sexual progression. It's the heart that brings the most feelings.
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Creati0n says: still my favorite. <3
I sacrificed my firstborn for this great human being to join (M) ~R
Just Use Thunder!
Creati0n says: still my favorite. <3
I sacrificed my firstborn for this great human being to join (M) ~R
Just Use Thunder!
Originally Posted by Hxcbbqimo
I will talk to you about Abstinence with a different viewpoint if I can.
Think of Abstinence as less of some pledge you make which you must achieve but more of a standard kept until you achieve what marriage stands for: true love. I know you are probably just a teenager so you most likely will believe many relationships were "The one" etc. etc. but you truly need to evaluate what abstinence could be all about: devotion.
I will be the first to admit: I am a virgin. I have been on-and-off dating with my girlfriend for the past 3 years. I (in a teenagers belief anyways) love her to death. She wants to have sex. But I am simply not ready to make that step. That's fine. She is understanding of that. You really need to work on the emotional aspects of the relationship, that way as your love for one another reaches new heights; you're physical actions will just occur naturally.
Forget about the STD's, pregnancy, etc. That shouldn't be your motivation. A strong moral compass will get you much farther than skewed statisitics using insane conditions. You wan't to date a girl or guy who you find things in common with who you also feel at least somewhat attracted towards. Enjoy activities with each other. Rely on each other with any and all emotional problems you have and help each other. If her mother isn't treating her well, lend her your shoulder to cry on. You both should be 2 seperate, independent, entities which make each others lives just a little bit easier.
In short, have sex with a person who you have grown a deep relationship with when you and your partner are 100% ready. If you and your partner get to that point, and are completely faithful, then simply by practicing safe sex your odds of acquiring an STD are slim to none.
But really, it's just sex. Don't big it up so much, it doesn't require a deep relationship, it's just you and you're partner engaging in something that feels good. By putting sex out there as almost a milestone for a point in your relationship for when you're both are 100% comfortable with each other you will start to let it govern your relationship, it shouldn't.
Think of it as a thing to do, almost for fun. Rather than something as meaningful and deep as you portray it to be. I've been in a relationship with a girl who I slept with before I actually started seeing her, that didn't make the emotional/trust building aspect any weaker but the physical aspect stronger it's good for a relationship.
Originally Posted by Fee
But really, it's just sex.
well thats as silly a comment as iv heard.
it isnt always JUST sex. its a connection thing. i wouldnt call it a milestone, i mean, people have had better relationships than i have, but sex wasnt involved.
its a trust thing, its not always gna "take your relationship to the next level" but it solidifies the bond between the two people.
i like hectors comment about the "checkpoint" tho, pretty accurate funnilly enough
and im not saying sex cant just be sex. but on a moral basis, i dont see how it can only be a physical thing...
-=Art is never finished, only abandoned=-
Originally Posted by Hxcbbqimo
Hector: That underevaluating statement couldn't have been more shallow or untrue. 1st checkpoint in a racing game? That's exactly the type of thinking of someone who values physical pleasure more than deep emotional relationships.
If I had to guess: You practiced the moral philisophy I just stated. You found a girl who you loved. You then dated with her, didn't want to rush into anything physical, and felt on top of the world. And that's when it happened: she broke up with you. Maybe even cheated on you with someone else? People these days take a jab to the jaw and rather than keep their chin up and practice the same techniques to win a fight that you always have done: play it defensive and swagger off.
I am not saying that passion isn't an aspect of any relationship, but passion doesn't mean sex. Passion can be that overwhelming feeling after holding the warm hands of your lover. Passion can be that comfort you feel when your partner holds you by their side for protection, safety, warmth. Passion can be that one wonderful and majestic kiss after a sincere and romantic moment, staring deeply into their eyes and telling them how much you love them. Sure, there are the more physical moments. The times where you make out, maybe french kiss. Maybe she lets you cup a feel. Maybe her hand went a little more below the waist, or your hug grabbed a little farther south than her hip. But all of these great moments involving physical satisfaction aren't nearly as satisfying as the emotional moments.
I will give you an example. Say anything happens that's more physical than emotional. Say making out in the back of a movie theatre. Is that a great moment for us? Sure. But it's when she looks into my eyes deeply and tells me that I make her life soo much better and that she will always love me that feels my heart with more warmth and happiness than any sexual act.
And before anyways asks me: Yes. Sex is great. Sex is suppose to be the ultimate bond in the relationship between a man and a woman. Where they both emotionally and physically become one entity. But all physical moments are only as satisfying as the emotions that run through both of you. Forget physical and sexual progression. It's the heart that brings the most feelings.
Why so serious, my little romantic prince?
Actually I can't argue with a person who doesn't know what sex is. I don't set these things against each other, but all these sentiments with "looking into my eyes deeply" is a bullshit against situation when she looks into your male beast eyes during a wild sex. That's nature, man, and it's over us. You are talking about "High" feelings, but as 2d floor can't exist without 1st and 1st without basement feelings can't be sterling w/o "low" emotions that sex gives. It's the heart that brings the most feelings.
Wanna bet? Let's imagine situation - there is a girl, not a virgin and w/o any psychic/sexual problems. And there are two fellows, one offers her "love to death and serenades under the balcony, but strictly without sex before marriage" and another offers her to "have a good time, date and by the way having a nice sex together" The choice would be obvious. What a pity, isn't it?
There's a classic 80's song, title says it all
Last edited by Hector; Feb 25, 2010 at 07:41 PM.
[Damned] Clan Bank. All inventory on sale
